CONDITIONAL
by Scott C. Kaestner

“To be a poet is a condition, not a profession”
-Robert Frost-

            If we are to believe this quote, then we can easily deduce that a poet – in addition to dancing with their muse and laying down subsequent verse – must also work in a field outside their true calling in order to keep a roof over their head, food in their belly, liquor in their liver, etc., etc. This is especially true in our modern world where everything is inflated except for the nonexistent poetry market. Therefore, yes, I am referring to that tiny (only three letters long) yet deadly word dreaded by poets around the planet... J – O – B!
            I am a thirty-seven year-old published full-time poet/forty hours a week full-time worker who resides in Los Angeles, California (one of the most expensive cities to live in the United States) and I can not only attest to the validity of the Frost quote but also theorize how an outside profession can benefit the condition of being a poet.
            Before I begin to explain my theory, I must acknowledge that I have spent many seemingly endless days in a myriad of jobs (some quite awful, some not that bad) killing time thinking about how hard I’m trying not to think about my bullshit job w/ Bullshit, Inc. Asking myself constantly, why should an educated man destined to write poetry have to play a submissive role in the downfall of western civilization? Slaving away in a cubicle where the upholstered walls are closing in as the hands on the company’s clock serve a constant reminder that my life is ticking away. But I digress for that was the past – before I flipped the switch and started to look at things a different way.
            It was over seven years ago at the cathartic age of thirty after extensive reading on Buddhism and beginning to practice a zen existence of constantly being in ‘the moment’ that I realized being consumed by negative energy would only produce negative outcomes. And like any rational being I wanted to enjoy success – not always dwell in failure – so I had to put a positive spin on my circumstance, my condition or it would eat me alive.  At that moment, I decided to accept my reality and like a majority of people in this world work at a job that perhaps wasn’t exactly a dream come true in order to maintain my existence. But that’s only part of the story for I have been blessed with the gift to make words dance and a partner to constantly dance with – my muse.
            Furthermore, my reality and my gift are interwoven for a reason. A poet (at least a good one) must be intently tuned into the human condition in order to produce legitimate verse. It is through various modes of communication that we can see the world outside ourselves and begin to understand what it’s like to walk in someone else’s shoes. Poetry is essentially a mode of communicating the human condition through words that transcend the mundane, speak to the heart, and touch the soul. Poems are the ties that bind us together as one; as human beings with talents, shortcomings, jobs, hobbies, dreams, aspirations, successes and failures.
            When this perspective really began to sink in and take root within me, a whole new world opened up in terms of my writing. Everything and I mean everything was fodder for my muse and I – a virus ridden computer- became a metaphor for overcoming obstacles in life, an unreasonable boss merely a reminder that humanity is inherently flawed, crushes on pretty co-workers blossomed into flowering sonnets, letters were written as free verse, e-mails became haikus – I was writing like a madman both day and night. My condition was producing like never before and journals were publishing my poems on a regular basis. Even my professional life began to better itself effortlessly because I had shed all negativity and replaced it with nothing but sunshine daydreams.          Fast forward unto today where I continue to publish, have two chapbooks of poetry to my name, am putting the finishing touches on a full-length manuscript, read at venues throughout southern California, and have a blossoming career in the educational field.
I do realize that all of this may come across as pedestrian or just too easy to be effective. But life is simple and simplicity gives birth to clarity which allows us to see a greater purpose beyond the ritual of everyday life. As a poet, it is this greater purpose I strive to achieve as my path unfolds – nothing will stand in the way yet everything will further the cause... including a J – O – B. And so it is that Monday through Friday, fifty two weeks a year my muse and I head to work – dancing every step of the way.

 Scott C. Kaestner is a poet who resides in Los Angeles, California with a myriad of publication credits to his name (google 'scott kaestner poetry'). He has published two chapbooks of poetry: 'The Great Charade'
(self-published) and 'Angeleno A Go Go' (Wasteland Press). In addition to writing, he likes to ride the waves of the mighty Pacific, walk his dog, and stare at the ceiling in his apartment for hours at a time.

SHELFLIFEMAGAZINE ARCHIVES: issue #002